Right, my children of the high fructose corn syrup. I have decided to join the blogosphere, that electronic army of the narcissistic, those makers of mountains from mundane molehills. Despite my reluctance, I decided I could not stay silent any longer. Yes, I said to myself, it is time that we are heard. That every time my dog howls at fire trucks, that howl should ring through the internet, a trumpet of truth for all that is cute and furry.
Friday I move to New York City to begin work as a doorman. I am following my father’s advice to me about working hard: “You can open doors, or you can close them.” Luckily for you, me, and for the world of doormen, I was stupid enough to take his advice literally.
So join me, my fine un-fettered friends, and let us watch as I experiment in the post-graduate, post-modern, pre-responsibility and pretentious phase of my life. I will be both sincere and sarcastic, serious and silly, sexy and sexier. I will try to be entertaining and brief, illuminating and infuriating, inconsequent yet continent.
The next few entries are going to be boring, written from the perspective of a maniacal tee-totaller hell bent on self-domination. It is simply to lay out the premise for what this whole bloggy business is. That being done, may this be fun, or at the very lest, entertaining.
So bear with me, pookies.