Monthly Archives: December 2010

Aristocratic aspirations: BigAdam of Bushwick

In case you couldn’t tell from my baronial mustaches (which I have been cultivating since a hair first sprouted from my virgin chin like the first green sprig of spring), I have great ambitions in Bushwick, the land of beards … Continue reading

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My burrito recipe, and how to eat moldy food.

The streets of New York City are tough, and the story is common: young boy from Texas moves to Manhattan, tries to seduce older women, quickly loses all his money, befriends Dustin Hoffman, and then takes very long bus trip … Continue reading

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Why wearing assless chaps is safer than a bicycle helmet

Denial is a wonderful thing. Denial allows me to seriously say that sleeping on a camping mat is comfortable (it is!) or that my minimalist lifestyle (including camping mat) does not have an adverse effect on my dating life. Denial … Continue reading

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Holiday Shopping or, the Terminator

Thousands of years ago, an elf named Arnold Schwarzenegger came back from the future in order to preach peace, love, and the importance of bargain shopping to the masses. For his effort, he was rewarded with a rebellion by certain … Continue reading

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Going job hunting, ending up in a movie.

As a life long vegetarian, hunting has never really been my thing. I find even the occasional mushroom foraging foray a (a “fo-fay” as we call it), less than stimulating. A birthday present from my meat-eating uncles was a one-year … Continue reading

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A response to all you mad haters.

A friend of mine recently complained that my blog is frequently pointless, to which I replied by crouching, snorting loudly, and doing a couple of shuffle steps to the side. This, Jane Goodall once taught me in a vision, is … Continue reading

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My overscheduled unemployment

First: Can someone explain why the top searches to find my blog are currently “cyclist pee, cyclist piss, man pee xxx, hipster style blogs, hipster style bedding”? Obviously, I’m doing something very right, or very wrong. Anyway. Homebabies and homegirls, … Continue reading

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